Phi-Fic Chapter 325 Human Relationships and Worldly Wisdom.
Chapter 325 Human Relationships and Worldly Wisdom.
Chapter 325 Human Relationships and Worldly Wisdom.
Sixth place —
Madara Uchiha
In the timeline of the Fourth Shinobi World War, Madara Uchiha, who had just stolen six cans of Want Want milk from the useless brat (Obito Uchiha), saw his own name.
Madara Uchiha handed the six cans of Want Want milk he was holding to Watama, Itama, Togakure, Myoko, Kuroka, and Izuna respectively, then turned to watch the little divine tree causing trouble in the barrage of comments.
The only one who didn't get a share of Want Want milk, Tobirama Ichiju: "Hmph!"
Madara Uchiha didn't even look at him. "Clear away the flowers around you first! They're in your way!"
The all-knowing gods bestowed upon the second-generation leader so many roses, camellias, and hibiscus that the place where he stood was piled high with them.
After all, it was someone else's kind gesture, and Tobirama Senju couldn't just wash it away with a single sea-escape technique.
Izuna even mocked him, "Are you the Flower Shadow or the Hokage?"
Tobirama remained silent with a cold expression, but he remembered this grudge.
[Sixth Place: Uchiha Madara]
Representative song "Love You" by Madara Uchiha; Provincial dialect by Minato Namikaze & Itachi Uchiha & Sakura Haruno & Kakashi Hatake & Shisui Uchiha & Naruto Uzumaki & Sasuke Uchiha & Madara Uchiha & Hinata Hyuga.
"My Hometown in Northeast China" - Uchiha, Uchiha Shisui, Uchiha Madara, Uchiha Obito, Uchiha Sasuke; "Give Me a Resurrection, and I'll Single-handedly Beat Up the Five Kage Alliance" - Uchiha Madara; "The Kiss Was Too Real" - Senju Hashirama, Uchiha Madara; "The Funeral of Roses" - Uchiha Madara; "East Wind Breaks" - Uchiha Madara's song "I Love You" and the song "The Kiss Was Too Real" sung with Hashirama left him with severe psychological trauma.
Even though his secrets were exposed to the ninja world and he was constantly being humiliated, and even though he couldn't urinate properly because someone was behind him, none of that was as fatal as making him sing those two songs in front of the entire ninja world!
"Don't mention those two songs in front of me again!!!" Madara Uchiha roared, his hair standing on end in anger.
In the distance, Naruto whispered to Team 7, "His hair looks as thick and heavy as a blanket, and it's like a cat's tail. It sticks up and stands on end when he gets angry."
Because Obito Uchiha was stationed next to Kakashi, Minato's team and Kakashi's team were a small group of six people who were integrated together.
After regaining his original personality, Obito Uchiha was like another Naruto Uzumaki, but a particularly annoying one.
He joined Naruto in unrestrainedly criticizing Madara: "Ha, because of those two songs, that old geezer has no face left at all."
Am I the only one in your heart?
"Love means that I often mess with you~"
Oh, baby, say more sweet nothings~
The thought of Madara Uchiha's voice singing such a girlish song sent a chill down the spine of the ninja world.
Bullet comments—
【斑爷一开口我直接跪了！！循环一百遍！！】10w+人觉得很赞【「爱你」这两个字从斑爷嘴里说出来怎幺像终极幻术啊？！我血条空了！！】10w+人觉得很赞【这就是我斑爷的业务能力吗？！】10w+人觉得很赞【建议直接列入《火影忍者》未解之谜：宇智波斑究竟还有多少隐藏技能？？】10w+人觉得很赞【救命啊哈哈哈哈那真的是宇智波斑吗？！明明是一只奶凶奶凶的傲娇猫猫！！】10w+人觉得很赞【这话也就隔着屏幕，否则除了宇智波斑我不认为任何人敢这幺说。】10w+
People who found it hilarious were enraged and yelled at the comments section above, "Even Hashirama wouldn't say something like that!!"
Where's the prestige?!
What happened to his impressive feat of 1v5, utterly defeating the Five Kage?!
He single-handedly surrounded an entire Allied Shinobi Forces army!
The songs "Provincial Dialects" and "My Hometown in Northeast China" almost made me laugh until I couldn't breathe.
10+ people liked this: 【Madara Uchiha's Northeastern accent is so authentic!】 10+ people liked this: 【I suspect the Uchiha moved from Northeast China to the Land of Fire.】 10+ people liked this: 【I love Madara's line: forehead, nose bridge, drool, kang (heated brick bed), door curtain, ice shards, shoulders, curb, hip joint, two chairs, flat-chested calf, little bean】 10+ people liked this: 【I would call Madara a pure-blooded Northeastern man! With Sister Yu and Madara backing us up, who can argue with that?】
Let's get straight to it!! 】10+ people think it's great【I have a somewhat incomplete idea————】10+ people think it's great【If we merge that island into our Northeast, and round it down to Madara, then we'd be Northeasterners.】10+ people think it's great【Can we just keep the manga artists, voice actors, and musicians?】10+ people think it's great【We're saying, small animals and actresses aren't out of the question————】10+ people think it's great These words aren't really understood by the ninja community. Besides the strange melodies, they don't understand why those two songs are so popular, with comments flying everywhere.
"Sometimes I really can't understand the preferences of those 'all-knowing gods.'"
Tobirama applied the terminology he learned from God: "The point of being cute is really strange—"
Kawarama really liked to imitate his older brother Tobirama: "XP is weird."
Then he was picked up by his brother Tobirama and given a good beating.
Itama, Togakushi, Myoko, and Kurofire: "Don't complain."
Izuna tried hard not to laugh; the Senju family's antics were too much, too funny.
The lyrics to "Dong Feng Po" that Madara sang for the Pillar Emperor are also quite good:
Who stands atop the Hokage Cliff as a gust of east wind blows by?♪
Time has accumulated on the walls, revealing glimpses of my childhood~♪
I still remember that year when we weren't wearing armor~♪
Now the wind whispers mournfully as I wait, but no one cares.♪
Who was startled to discover that a sudden east wind had broken through the Valley of the End?♪
The flames of war have stained the story into a mess, which I'm piecing together~♪
We each took the wrong path on the path outside Konoha~♪
In those years of war and arrows, fate was too short to repay the debts of the past.♪
Before Madara Uchiha could say anything, Tobirama Senju was already dissatisfied.
"Don't let Ban sing 'Dong Feng Po' for his brother just because his older brother sang 'Seeking Buddha' for him!"
"Tobirama, there's nothing wrong with the lyrics to Madara's song 'East Wind Breaks,' right? Besides, I think Madara sings it really well."
There really isn't a problem.
The lyrics also beautifully depict the scene of two powerful figures, who could have easily defeated four countries, parting ways and experiencing inner turmoil.
Izuna retorted to Tobirama, "Aren't you being a little too protective of your brother? He's your brother, not your sister."
Tobirama was a little embarrassed, and an unnatural blush appeared on his fair skin.
Madara Uchiha, from the limited Tsukuyomi timeline, stroked his chin thoughtfully and said, "If Hashirama and Tobirama were both girls, I wouldn't mind eating a sister-don or something~"
Timeline of the Fourth World War—
Hashirama was stunned during the Fourth Shinobi World War, while Tobirama was enraged.
When Madara heard what his own voice was saying, his mind went completely blank with fear.
Izuna's Sharingan was wide open when he was resurrected.
These remarks left the ninjas of the Fourth Shinobi World War timeline feeling like they'd swallowed fly droppings—unable to spit them out or swallow them down.
It can only be said that when it comes to the "playboy" thing, the Uchiha clan in the Tsukuyomi world is still far too authoritative.
The Valley of the End's Original Timeline —
Madara Uchiha noticed that Tobirama Senju was frowning beside him and assumed that she had some objection to his singing.
"What are you thinking about—"
Following his usual practice, Madara Uchiha almost added the word "woman" after his sentence, making it: "What are you thinking about? Woman."
But for various reasons, Madara Uchiha swallowed the word "woman".
After a moment of silence, Tobirama Senju finally asked Madara Uchiha the question that had been bothering him.
"After being sealed by Planetary Devastation, can Black Zetsu still speak?"
"What do you mean?"
Tobirama Senju didn't want to fight Madara Uchiha, so he suppressed the urge to call him an idiot, rolled his eyes inwardly, and continued to Madara, "What if he gets a ranking?"
"You mean Black Zetsu can also make wishes?!"
In many timelines, Black Zetsu has not yet been sealed, and even if he were sealed, it is not certain whether he could still speak.
If he really wished to resurrect Kaguya—
Or perhaps they can't think of any other wishes, which could be a very tricky situation.
"Impossible!" Madara retorted, adding that Tobirama had said the Uchiha were overthinking things. "Black Zetsu only sang two songs; how could he possibly have the chance to make a wish?"
Tobirama Senju rubbed his temples, looking pained. "But the number of comments on those two songs is more than you could get for ten of your songs."
Madara wanted to say that he hadn't sung ten songs, but arguing with Tobirama about it would make him seem narrow-minded.
Turning his head and letting out a cold snort, Madara Uchiha looked at the rankings that continued to appear in the sky and said, "You've sung at least a dozen songs, haven't you? If you can't even squeeze out Black Zetsu, you might as well not live in this world!"
Tobirama was furious, but adhering to the principle that a gentleman's revenge is never too late, she suppressed her anger for the time being.
She raised her delicate, fair chin, her crimson eyes, the color of her Sharingan, looking at the comment section: [Fifth Place: Uchiha Sasuke]
Representative songs—
"Growing Up Carrying 10,000 Pounds of Weight" - Uchiha Sasuke & Uzumaki Naruto; "Sunny and Cheerful Big Boy" - Uchiha's Four Laughing Heroes; "Let's Get Married" - Uchiha Sasuke & Uzumaki Naruto; "Brothers, Give Me a Hug" - Uchiha Sasuke & Uchiha Shisui & Uchiha Itachi & Uchiha Madara & Senju Hashirama & Senju Tobirama; "DaDaDa" - Uchiha Sasuke; "Really Not Asleep" - Uchiha Sasuke.
Obito:
'
Itachi:
'
'
spot:
'
They've really stopped acting! They've just brought out the "Four Laughing Uchiha" for them!
[Hahahaha! This song really made the cut! Uchiha as a sunny and cheerful big boy? We'll probably have to wait for the limited Tsukuyomi world.] 10+ people think it's great. [Uchiha: Not a bit sunny!] 10+ people think it's great. [Tobirama Senju: How could the evil Uchiha be sunny and cheerful?] 10+ people think it's great. [Shouldn't Hashirama, Tobirama, Naruto, Kiba, and Rock Lee be the ones to sing this song?] 10+ people think it's great. [Tobirama sings "sunny and cheerful big boy"? Didn't the Second Hokage and the Sixth Hokage already have one foot in the Uchiha clan?] 10+ people think it's great. The comments are always making these kinds of jokes, making the ninja world very itchy. They really want to try calling the Second Hokage Uchiha Tobirama and Kakashi Uchiha Kakashi. But the person with the guts would need to be able to beat the First Hokage and the White Fang of Konoha.
[How can it be cute without contrast?] 10+ people liked this, and the four laughing Uchiha heroes collectively facepalmed:
Don't build your "cuteness" on our suffering! Our suffering is even greater than Pain's.
And Sasuke can't help but shudder every time he sees the song "Let's Get Married".
The song "Brothers, Give Me a Hug" was actually the one that hurt them the least, but the comments section still didn't let them off the hook.
[Hahaha, a bunch of Uchiha mixed with two Senju] 10+ people think this is great. [Uchiha Shisui should be replaced with Uchiha Izuna, then it's Itachi, Sasuke, Madara, Izuna, and the Hashirama-Tobirama trio.] 10+ people think this is great. [Itachi: My stupid little brother, do you remember when we were little, your brother held you while you watched the puppies?] 10+ people think this is great. [Puppies?] 10+ people think this is great. [The little Shiba Inu from Infinite Tsukuyomi?] 10+ people think this is great. [Uchiha Izuna? The woman who tried to hug Sasuke but was pushed away by him?] 10+ people think this is great. [It should be the night of the Nine-Tails' rampage, watching the Nine-Tails together?] 10+ people think this is great. [doge.jpg, I'm reminded of having the Uchiha sing "Unforgettable Tonight" again!] 10+ people think this is great. Kurama: "You're the dog!! Bastard!! I'm a fox!!"
Uchiha: "You'll never forget this night! Don't bring it up again!!"
That silly "Oh, little brother" phrase always pops up whenever Sasuke and Itachi are in the same frame, which really annoys Sasuke.
In the timeline before the Uchiha clan was wiped out, six-year-old Sasuke even stood with his hands on his hips and protested to his older brother: "Brother! From today onwards! You have to call me Smart Younger Brother!!"
Itachi Uchiha was so charmed by his younger brother's cuteness that his health bar was completely depleted.
[Brother, give me a hug. Hug = explode, multiplying the explosion of explosive tags. Does Tobirama really want to blow everyone except himself and his brother up?] 10+ people think this is great. [Brother, tell me your thoughts. Tobirama: Well, I'll just say what I have to say—] 10+ people think this is great. [Tobirama: Big brother! Wipe out the Uchiha!] 10+ people think this is great. Tobirama, hands on hips, roars: "I've already said! I have no personal grudge against the Uchiha! It's just that as Hokage, I need to control unstable elements!!"
He was truly exasperated by these people! They always harp on this joke and talk nonsense! It's like they think he hates the Uchiha clan so much!
In the original timeline of the Valley of the End, Tobirama, now a woman, inexplicably explained to Madara, "I didn't say that."
"————"
Madara Uchiha thought to himself: Why are you explaining this to me?
"I will not have a good impression of you."
"You think I'm hoping you'll have a good impression of me? Ha."
Madara Uchiha, mocked by her, casually remarked, "An unlikable woman."
The word "woman" still came out of Ban's mouth, and Ban regretted it but couldn't take it back.
Tobirama was furious, but his chakra was insufficient at the moment. Even if it were full, he still couldn't defeat Madara Uchiha. He could only remember the grudge.
As for "DaDa Da" and "Really Not Asleep"—
Upon seeing these two songs, Uchiha Sasuke even questioned the taste of the "omniscient gods".
The lyrics really electrified us, like electricity blasting through the city. I said, "Come here," and you said, "Okay, okay, okay~"♪
This VC was also paired with animations where Itachi beckons and Sasuke happily hugs him, and Sasuke beckons and Sakura blushes and asks for a "reward".
It's obvious how much Sasuke likes his brother; Sasuke is so annoyed that it's as if the entire ninja world has stripped him naked.
Sakura's feelings for Sasuke are practically an open secret in the ninja world. However, not long before this scene in the anime, some Sakura fans were calling Hinata's feelings for Naruto a clingy, manipulative simp. And then, VC (Video Creator) released this scene right on cue—
Originally, if it were just lyrics and VC, it wouldn't be anything special. Instead, it showed a girl's pure and innocent feelings about love, which would make anyone who saw it just smile and think that the pink-haired girl was quite cute.
As a result, those toxic fans who disgusted Sakura so much that she wanted to punch them away didn't utter a single dirty word, yet made her, the main character, feel utterly ashamed, as if she had been nailed to the pillar of shame for being a sycophant of a charming man.
Sakura in the Boruto timeline was so angry she felt like her lungs were about to explode, and she wished she could send all her fans to the moon!
[This song also has a Kakashi version! Highly recommended! As soon as I heard Kakashi's "DaDaDa," I ran over there on my own.] 10+ people think it's awesome! Kakashi, Itachi, Naruto, Madara, Hashirama, Might Guy, Sakura, Orochimaru, and the Second Young Master ————
Besides these, how many other names are there?!
Those all-knowing gods are really good at naming things!
[The song "I'm Not Asleep" perfectly suits Charasu from the limited Tsukuyomi world.] 10+ people think it's great. [If it were Charasu, he probably wouldn't sing "I'm Not Asleep" at all, but would boldly admit, "Yes, I slept, and with four or five cute kittens~"] 10+ people think it's great. Sasuke Uchiha from the limited Tsukuyomi world is smug.
Beneath Sasuke's cold expression in the Fourth Shinobi World War lies a bewildered heart.
What four or five cute kittens! He doesn't want any of them! Women will only slow him down the speed at which he draws his sword!! ←Popular meme in the comments.
【Although she gave me roses, I really didn't sleep with her last night. These lyrics rhyme so well.】 10+ people liked this. 【Imagining a farce involving Sasuke, Sakura, and Hinata.】 10+ people liked this. 【Or maybe it's Charasu vs. the heroine Sakura and the hot Hinata?】 10+ people liked this. 【I don't agree without Naruto, that little succubus.】 10+ people liked this. Sasuke and Naruto from the Boruto timeline would feel incredibly awkward seeing these comments every time; one feels he can't explain himself to someone else's wife, and the other feels his wife can't explain herself to someone else.
It's simply a masterpiece of human cynicism and worldly wisdom.
Fortunately, the fourth-ranked songstress appeared shortly afterward, which at least slightly reduced the buzz surrounding Uchiha Sasuke.
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