The female anchor turned into the dean of an ancient academy

Chapter 309: Hesitation and Loss

"You're here." His voice was low and hoarse, with a hint of fatigue that was hard to conceal. Every word seemed to be squeezed out from the depths of his heart with difficulty, full of helplessness and bitterness.

Cen Jiexiao walked up to him step by step, her eyes locked on his face, trying to find a hint of an answer from his haggard face. She wanted to know why he had deceived her and why he had made her endure such great pain and suffering.

"Why is this happening?" Cen Jiexiao asked, word by word, each word coming out through gritted teeth, filled with grievance and confusion. Her voice trembled, as if she would collapse at any moment.

Chen Zigui didn't answer immediately, but simply stared at her quietly, his eyes filled with a complex mix of emotions. Guilt, reluctance, helplessness, and deep pain. He opened his mouth, as if on the verge of saying something, but nothing came out. A thousand words choked in his throat, ultimately fading into a sigh. The helplessness in his eyes surged like a tide, a feeling of powerlessness in the face of fate, the despair of being stuck in a quagmire and unable to extricate oneself.

Unable to contain herself any longer, Cen Jiexiao took a step forward, hugged him tightly, and buried her head in his chest. Tears welled up in her eyes again, soaking his clothes. "Why are you so foolish? Do you know how worried I am about you? Do you know how sad I am?" Her voice was choked with sobs, filled with despair and helplessness, like a lost child seeking a final comfort.

Chen Zigui's body stiffened slightly, then he reached out and gently stroked her hair, as if it were a precious piece of porcelain, delicately yet tenderly. His tone was gentle yet helpless, tinged with an indescribable bitterness. "I'm sorry, Sister Cen, this is all I can do..." These brief words contained all his helplessness and heartache, foreshadowing the impending separation and pain.

After Chen Zigui left, Cen Jiexiao lingered for a long time where he had stood, as if she could still sense his lingering warmth. She slowly walked to the window and gazed out at the bleak autumn scenery. Withered yellow leaves drifted in the cold wind, a desolate scene, just like her current mood. The sky was gloomy, without a single ray of sunshine, just like her current state of mind: gray and hopeless.

She understood Chen Zigui's difficulties, the burden he carried. He was forced to do what he wanted, to be swept along by fate, to be forced by reality. She knew he hadn't deliberately deceived her, nor did he not love her. But even though she understood, the pain in her heart remained unrelieved. The feeling of unrequited love was like a blunt knife, slowly cutting her heart, one cut after another, meticulously and repeatedly, leaving her with an excruciating pain.

She wanted to be with him, no matter what. Even a short time together would be better than this long separation. But she couldn't. She couldn't make things difficult for him, couldn't let him bear more pressure. She could only endure it all silently, hiding all the pain deep in her heart.

When Cen Jiexiao returned to the villa, she was like a lost soul, her steps were weak and her eyes were empty, like a walking corpse. She walked aimlessly in the yard, each step feeling like she was stepping on cotton, light and weightless.

Yulan and Xiaoman watched from afar, worried, but not daring to disturb them. Yulan sighed softly, "What happened to the dean? Did he have a fight with Master Chen?"

Xiaoman curled her lips: "It's not a quarrel at all, it's clearly one-sided abuse! Look at the teacher's distraught look, tsk tsk tsk, what a sin!"

Cen Jiexiao's heart was in turmoil, her thoughts a tangled mess, like a tangled thread, impossible to cut or untangle. She understood Chen Zigui's difficulties, but what could she do? In this deep palace, the words "I have no choice" were like a mountain, weighing down one's breath. She remembered Chen Zigui's words, "I can only do this," and her heart felt like it was being pricked by needles, a sharp pain. Every word of that sentence was like a sharp thorn, piercing her heart and making her feel so painful that she couldn't breathe.

She recalled every detail of their relationship over and over again, from the moment they first met to the moment they met, and from the moment they met to the moment they fell in love. Every scene was clearly imprinted in her mind, lingering. Those sweet memories had now turned into bitter poison, tormenting her body and mind.

She wished so much to return to the past, to when she had just traveled through time, when they had first met, to those carefree days. However, time could not be reversed, nothing could be returned. She could only endure it all in silence, licking her wounds alone.

She looked up at the sky, a gray, starless sky, just like her future, which was completely uncertain. She didn't know how to proceed, nor did she know how to place this love. She only knew that at this moment, her heart was torn and she was in agony.

For the next few days, Cen Jiexiao forced herself to look calm and collected as she handled various palace affairs. Every morning, she would appear at the Shanggong Bureau on time to arrange beauty and skincare classes for the palace ladies, carefully explaining various beauty secrets and massage techniques, striving to ensure that each woman had a radiant complexion.

In the afternoon, she would rush to the academy to oversee the implementation of the new teaching method, check on students' learning progress, answer their questions, and encourage them to study hard. In the evening, she would go to the newly established printing house to inspect the printing quality of books, ensuring that each book was clear and beautiful, so as to better spread knowledge.

In addition, there are all kinds of things, big and small, waiting for her to worry about, such as the preparation of festival celebrations in the palace, the training of palace maids and eunuchs, and even the pruning of flowers and plants in the imperial garden. She has to do everything herself and dare not slack off in the slightest.

Cen Jiexiao was like a top, spinning non-stop, busy all the time, trying to numb herself with busy work, not thinking about Chen Zigui, not thinking about the struggle for imperial power that made her heartbroken.

On this day, Cen Jiexiao was frowning at the new issue of "Women's Youth Daily". She looked carefully at the headline on the front page and repeatedly considered the wording. She always felt that the content was a bit exaggerated, as if deliberately exaggerating the achievements of certain officials.

She picked up the pen and wanted to make some changes, but hesitated, not knowing how to revise it so that it would not be distorted or offend anyone. At this time, a maidservant beside the queen, a young girl named Xiaoliu, suddenly came and saluted her breathlessly, saying that the queen had summoned her to the palace.

Cen Jiexiao was bewildered, her mind brimming with doubts. What did the Queen want her for? Was she running out of the "Skin Beauty Secret Set" she'd mixed last time, and wanted her to remix some? Or was it some other noblewoman in the palace who had a new beauty need? She was completely baffled, and with her questions swirling in her mind, she followed Xiaotao to Fengyi Palace.